Two years ago C and I were stopped in traffic on a highway, and an 18-wheeler hit us from behind going at least 60 miles an hour. One surgery, one lawsuit, some physical therapy and lots and lots of aches and pains and meetings later, we finally settled. The company that hit us S.U.C.K.S. It's a family-owned Utah-based highly conservative very dangerous trucking company with a safety rating that puts them within a few months of going out of business. Their trucks were in four hundred accidents in the last two years and they were responsible for twenty accidents resulting in at least one fatalitiy in the same time period. Aside from that, they *really* didn't want to give us any money because of our couplehood. In fact, at one point during mediation, we were only 10% apart and the guy flat out said, "I'm not giving another penny to that dyke." So we walked. And they ended up setting for 15% more than if they had just split down the middle at that point, and that felt good. We figure the best revenge is a life lived well, so we'll send the guy a Christmas card after the baby is born and thank him for financing a portion of our happy child's college fund.
So the settlement for that adventure was completed this week, and on Sunday night we were driving down a five-lane highway when some little high-school girl crashed into the side of our car because it was too much trouble to actually look before changing lanes. She sent us into a 180 degree spin that landed us three lanes away from where we started, facing the wrong way, sticking out into traffic. If you live in Houston, you know how crazy our highways are, and our only thought was getting out of the car before it got T-ed by someone in the lane we were stuck in, so we jumped over the concrete wall and waited for someone to hit our stuck car. By some miracle, we only witnessed lots and lots of smoking tires and near-accidents, we really didn't want to kill anyone else! EMS came and blocked the scene pretty quickly, and neither of us were injured, just scared to death. Of course teenager stopped to check out her own damage and then took off before we could get her license plate. I can't imagine what lies she told her daddy. Evenutally we were able to restart my car and we limped on home.
That's the end of my Honda Civic days. Now we're looking at Range Rovers and Ford F-350s. (Kidding, but sometimes here in Houston it really does seem like the biggest car wins.) We're actually looking at the ultimate lesbian mom stereotype car, the Subaru station wagon, or the ultimate rich lesbian mom stereotype car, the Volvo station wagon. I think the Sube will win because we can't realistically wrap our minds around paying so much cash for a vehicle. The bottom line is, we want something that 's substantial, stops on a dime, and quickly accelerates past idiot truck drivers and teens.
It's not just us anymore, we have to look out for the speckle.
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